What the Church is Meant to Be
Joy Henning, Member
United Congregational Church, UCC, Worcester, MA

(excerpted from "Strength Training for the Body of Christ- An ONA Approach" A publication of the United Church of Christ Coalition for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Concerns)

When my partner Gloria, my daughter, Amy, and I first walked into the United Congregational Church in the summer of 1998, we were not seeking an Open and Affirming (ONA) church. In fact we had never heard of ONA until the worship leader that Sunday morning stood up and proclaimed United to be "an open and affirming congregation of the United Church of Christ." We did not know what that meant but it sounded good and we sensed that it boded well for us. We had come to church that day at the invitation of a friend whose son had been baptized there and who promised that we would be able to worship there in peace and safety. We came not knowing what to expect and probably not expecting much.

As an Evangelical deeply bruised by a recent experience in my home church, I was leery, skeptical as to whether a so-called "mainline" church could provide the spiritual fervor for which I longed, and uncertain as to whether we would truly be welcomed; whether the straight majority would change its collective mind and we would once again be left without a spiritual home. As a parent, I was also concerned about the welfare of my daughter, then nine. Would she be able to find the Christian community and the spiritual nurture that she needed? Would the gay-friendly church that I was looking for be kid friendly enough for her? I thought it was all too much to ask. I did not even dare pray for so much. Really I thought it would be enough if we could just find- to paraphrase Shel Silverstein- a quiet place to sit down and rest.

The place we found is not quiet and we have seldom rested. It is noisy, disorganized, sometimes contentious, divided and flawed. At its best, however, it is the closest approximation to what I believe Jesus meant the Church to be that I have ever encountered. Just looking out from the lectern on a Sunday morning at the motley crew that dares to call itself the body of Christ is enough to take one's breath away. How does being Open and Affirming contribute to this heady stew? How does ONA enrich our worship, enliven our community and strengthen our mission?

The most visible effect is that United has attracted a concentration of faithful lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgendered Christians who participate gladly and faithfully in the life of the congregation. Under other, ironically better, circumstances many of us would still be elsewhere; in our home churches or in places where the worship style is more familiar, the theology more compatible or the ethnic or socioeconomic mix more comfortable than that which we find at United. We would still be, if we had had a choice, in the churches that do not want us. Instead, exiled LGBT people preach, teach, serve communion, decorate the altar, sing in the choir, tithe, wrestle with the budget, visit the sick, stock the food pantry, feed the homeless, work with youth, mentor confirmands, and support a special ministry for LGBT people in our area called OMEGA, - in short minister at United Congregational in every possible capacity.

For many of us, intense commitment is under girded by the knowledge that a welcoming community of believers is not something to be taken for granted; that for us, at least for now, a place to worship and serve is a hard-won privilege, not a generally accepted right. Our enthusiasm and gratitude for what we have found often drives us to witness: "YOU SHOULD COME TO OUR CHURCH SOMETIME" my friend Chris shouts to an acquaintance above the pounding din of the underground music at a local club. She assumes- probably correctly- that her friend does not have a church that accepts her as a lesbian and she wants her to know that such a place exists. She would be surprised to hear that some would call what she is doing proselytizing. She believes that she is offering her friend access to something that is of urgent importance and inestimable value- a life of faith.

But the benefits derived from a commitment to ONA extend far beyond the LGBT community alone. Our congregation included many long-time heterosexual members who, since the adoption of ONA have taken risks, crossed several comfort zones, and faced often dizzying changes, with grace, good humor, and a willingness to grow. In addition United has drawn newcomers who have chosen us out of a multiplicity of options precisely because at an ONA church diversity is the goal and outsiders of all stripes are welcome. We encompass traditional two-parent families intent on raising their children in a diverse world; single straight people comfortable in a place where the traditional paradigm is not so overwhelmingly dominant; people with disabilities; people in poverty, people struggling with mental illness; recovering addicts and eccentrics of all kinds. The underlying subtext seems to be: in a place where gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered members are openly accepted and affirmed, perhaps I too will be openly accepted and affirmed! Or as songwriter Paul Simon put it; "Maybe there's a reason to believe we all will be received in Grace Land."

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This article is just one chapter from a wonderful book, "Strength Training for the Body of Christ- An ONA Approach."Click here to go to the order form for the book at the UCC Coalition site.